Skewed Opinions Volume 1: Why Pessimism is the Way to Go

I wrote this a while ago, so I figured I'd share it with you all (or just myself... whoever ends up reading this.) After pondering how to explain my, shall we say skewed point of view on this, I shall just say this: This was a random writing exercise that I created for myself that was probably inspired by some movie, book, experience, or happening in my daily life. That does not necessarily mean that I believe everything I write, unless I specifically say so.

With that said, may I present... Mistydog's Skewed Opinions, Volume 1: Why Pessimism is the Way to Go:

                

Some of you may wonder, or may have asked me, why I can be so pessimistic sometimes. After giving it some thought, I have finally formulated answer for you all.

                Pessimists are people who expect the worst. The Optimist is quite obviously the opposite of the pessimist. These are the people who wake up in the morning expecting to win the lottery. Optimists are bouncy, hyperactive go-getters that take all the risks because, hey, nothing can go wrong in the land of the optimist.

                The land of the pessimist, however, is far different. They wake up and glance down at their powerball ticket with a heavy heart, because they, my friends, have already accepted the fact that they won’t win. In this case, this is a good thing. If you buy a lottery ticket every day for a year and, indeed, lose every day, for a year, you’ve just lost a good sum of money. Pessimists are generally viewed as melancholy, down-on-life people. Personally, I think that people who assume this are barking up the wrong tree. Pessimists are generally very cautious and assume the worst, so they won’t have to be disappointed later on. Then, when good comes their way, they get a shot of adrenaline straight out of the land of optimism, before they return to their pessimistic ways.

                Let us take scenario 1, for example. On the same night, both an optimist, and a pessimist decide to stay home alone, in their own respective houses. They are both teenage girls of the age of, oh, shall we say, 16? Their houses are across the street from one another. The Pessimist assumes the worst, and takes the cautionary action of locking her doors and window, then proceeding to curl up in the back of her closet with 911 on speed-dial so she won’t be kidnapped and murdered. The Optimist, on the other hand, opens her shades and sits out on the porch with the light on waiting for Taylor Lautner to break down in front of her house. Now, these would be the extreme versions of these examples, the Obsessive-Compulsives of the “imist” world, shall we say?

                Now, at the crack of dawn, the pessimist is found passed out in her closet, fast asleep with the phone in hand. The Optimist is found on her porch, still waiting for Taylor Lautner to show up. The Pessimist can be pleased that she survived another day, and is pleasantly surprised that she was not kidnapped and murdered. The Optimist, on the other hand, has to suffer the brutal reality that Taylor Lautner is nowhere near her crapptastic, hole-in-the-wall town. Though, because she’s an optimist, she’ll still be sitting out the next night, waiting for him cruise though the neighborhood and fly over the speed bump that the pessimist placed in the road. Pessimists are so considerate, don’t you think?

                The littlest thing can make the day for a Pessimist, while the Optimist has to suffer the downsides of always being at an extreme high. So, next time you pass a Pessimist in your daily routine, why not give them a cookie, or throw them a smile? You just might make their day.